Top Ten Signs You're Watching A Bad Beauty Pageant

Top Ten Signs You're Watching A Bad Beauty Pageant

10. It's broadcast on the Animal Planet network
9. Entrants must be over 70
8. Miss France gets ejected for violently head-butting Miss Italy
7. Instead of sash, Miss Iran is wearing an ammo vest
6. Contestants are judged in three categories: evening gown, interview, and competitive meatball-eating
5. Described as an "inner beauty" pageant
4. It's hosted by the decomposed remains of Bert Parks
3. Winner's platform: Spreading the message of Scientology
2. Contestants must have slept with Christie Brinkley's husband
1. Competitions highlighted by shootout between Miss Israel and Miss Lebanon


Copied from The Late Show website, airdate, July 20,2006.